


Strychnine

by Blanquette



Series: Corner Bakery [2]
Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Hopeful Ending, Light Angst, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-06
Updated: 2017-09-06
Packaged: 2018-12-24 09:10:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12009585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blanquette/pseuds/Blanquette
Summary: Hyungwon bites more than he can chew when he meets Minhyuk.





	Strychnine

**Author's Note:**

> Yup it's me again.  
> Still on a roll lmao this is my home now.

1.

Hyungwon is resting his head on his left arm, laid across the table. Said arm is getting numb, thousands of ants seemingly crawling on the inside of it. His head is too heavy to move, though, so he stays like this. From time to time, he licks the tip on his right index finger to swipe up the crumbs left in the small plate next to him, and brings them to his mouth. A sigh escapes his lips, he closes his eyes.

He’s that close to falling asleep when he hears a clatter and the familiar smell of buttery chocolate invades his nostrils. He opens his eyes, lifts his head a bit, and it’s Kihyun, exchanging his empty plate for one filled with chocolate bread.

“How long are you gonna be moping in here? You’re scaring away the clients.”

Hyungwon sits up, looks around him sleepily. The shop is empty.

“What clients? There’s no one.”

“Because of your bad vibes. Eat this and get out of my shop.”

The baker retreats behind the counter and Hyungwon considers him a moment, wondering how and when did they become friends. It feels like Hyungwon was just a client like any other until suddenly he was Kihyun’s best friend. Just like that. Well, maybe not best. Hoseok is fighting for the title as well.

He puts his head back on his arm, shifts to his other side when his neck gets stiff. His eyes fall on the art adorning the walls, and his stomach drops. Ah, that’s how they became friends. He had asked about the paintings. And Kihyun had proudly talked of his friend, Lee Minhyuk. The artist. That would go on to make some more great paintings, and wreck Hyungwon’s life. Hyungwon, who would then end up moping in Kihyun’s shop. So really, it was all Kihyun’s fault, and chocolate bread would never make up for it.

“Kihyun! It’s all your damn fault.”

“What?”

“Give me more bread. The one with almonds.”

Kihyun raises his eyebrows but doesn’t protest. He brings another plate, an almond croissant resting on top of it. He takes the chair opposite Hyungwon, watches him eat his pastries and his feelings with it.

“Okay. What did he say exactly?”

“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“If you don’t, I’m taking this bread away.”

“You wouldn’t dare.”

Hyungwon brings the plate closer to him, puts a protective arm around it. He knows Kihyun would most definitely dare.

“He just…”

 

2.

Minhyuk is loud. And bright and funny and the opposite of what Hyungwon imagines a painter would be. The opposite of Hyungwon, too. He enters his life a bit like a hurricane would, and Hyungwon can’t help but let him destroy all. He’s fascinated.

So he gets tangled up in him. In his mind, in his words, in his limbs. There’s passion at first. A forest fire, spreading wild and burning high. Hyungwon lets himself be subjugated. He’s lost, doesn’t know what’s happening half the time. He doesn’t mind. Minhyuk makes himself the center of his world. He burns his flesh with the tip of his long fingers and Hyungwon gives himself over entirely.

This cannot end well, he thinks, and it’s a thought that always comes back to him. But then there’s feverish eyes, a moan, a teasing hand on his thigh, and soon enough, Minhyuk is all there is, and the nagging thought goes up in smoke.

It’s all-consuming and Hyungwon doesn’t know if it is love but it is _something_ , and he thinks he cannot live without it. He knows he’s not the only one. Minhyuk shines, and other people take notice. Sometimes there’s blemishes on his body he didn’t put there, and when he notices them, Minhyuk looks at him with a challenge in his eyes. _What are you gonna do about it?_

He does nothing. Well, he bites and he sucks and he leaves marks of his own, and Minhyuk laughs, kisses him, deep and bruising, and sometimes jealousy will make him rough and Minhyuk will plead, and gasp, and wake-up with aching limbs. But that’s all. The next night Hyungwon’s bed would be cold and empty and the black beast stirring in the pits of his stomach would rear its ugly head.

 

3.

Hyungwon knows he cannot go on like this. He tells Minhyuk as much. The man looks surprised, tilts his head, asks, _are you sure_?

He is, and Minhyuk is gone. It’s good at first. Hyungwon finds himself again. He meets with his old friends, go out, remembers how to be alone, and he’s breathing fine, feeling light. The beast in his stomach sleeps soundly. He deserves better, his friends say, and yeah, he does. Someone that will take care of him, someone that will love him.

But there is no better than Lee Minhyuk, he realizes, when he sees him at a concert a month later, alone, dancing to the music, glistening with sweat, hair wild. It ends with someone’s back hurting a wall, frantic hands gripping at flesh, and Hyungwon realizes how much he had missed this, Minhyuk’s body pressed against his, his smell, the sounds he makes. The beast stirs in his stomach, dark want pooling in his belly, and when Minhyuk sinks to his knees, moaning when Hyungwon tightens his grip on his hair, he makes a mistake.

He falls in love.

 

4.

Minhyuk is not to be loved. You can’t tame fire. But Hyungwon can’t help it. So he tries to deal with these unwanted feelings. Takes as much as he can when Minhyuk is there, a baggage he can swift through when he is not. But love tints passion with melancholy, and he gets softer, and Minhyuk feels it. He sees a change in Hyungwon’s face when he looks at him, warmth tinted with sad longing. His touches grow tender, there is no more frantic urgency. Hyungwon takes his time, drinks him in with those dark eyes.

Minhyuk doesn’t look at him anymore when Hyungwon finds strangers’ marks on his body. He’s afraid of the hurt he’ll see. If Minhyuk is like fire, Hyungwon is lake-water, and Minhyuk isn’t sure he wants to see what lies in his depths. He drowns anyway.

And one day, he is gone.

 

5.

“He just disappeared on you? He said you guys talked.”

“We didn’t.”

Kihyun has his arms crossed over his chest, back straight. Hyungwon looks upon the sad remnants of the almond croissant, sights, pushes the crumbs to the side with his index finger.

“You know he left Seoul? He went back to Gwangju.”

Hyungwon looks stunned for a second.   

“For how long?”

“I don’t know, he didn’t say. You know how he is.”

Hyungwon nods. _Impulsive_. Kihyun is chewing the inside of his cheek, pensive. Then he stirs, pushing back his chair.

“Wait here, I have something to show you.”

He disappears behind the counter, taking the stairs leading to his apartment. Hyungwon is left to stare at the crumbs, and starts pushing them to the other side of the plate. Kihyun is back not five minutes later, with a small cardboard portfolio that he pushes towards Hyungwon.

“He left me this before leaving, for me to hang here if I wanted.”

Hyungwon glances at Kihyun, then carefully lifts the cover to look at the drawing inside. It’s a portrait drawn in charcoal. Minhyuk usually doesn’t do portraits. Even less in charcoal.

“I think it’s you. It’s you, isn’t it?”

The face isn’t quite recognizable. It looks like Minhyuk drew over it times and times again, unable to capture the likeness of the person. It looks like it’s moving. Like a reflection in the water. But the eyes. The eyes are his. He drops the cover back onto the drawing, looks up at Kihyun.

“What does it mean?”

“I don’t know. You tell me.”

“He never does portraits.”

“Yeah. He doesn’t.”

Hyungwon doesn’t like the feeling that stirs in his heart. It’s too much like hope.

 

6.

It’s raining. There’s a party for Kihyun’s big breakout in a magazine Hyungwon has to attend, but he’s far from ready. He’s watching the rain, trying to think of an excuse not to go. It’s been two weeks since Kihyun showed him that painting. There was no news of Minhyuk, for either of them. Decisions were made to move on, forget about him. None of them were followed. So, he’s watching the rain.

There’s a knock on his door and he’s about to play dead when a familiar voice calls his name. Time stands still, and his heart start hammering in his chest. He can hear it in his ears. He has to take a couple of second to steel himself before opening the door.

Minhyuk’s hair are all damp, his clothes too. _Forgot to take an umbrella,_ and his smile didn’t change. Hyungwon doesn’t know what to do. Minhyuk lets himself in, takes up residence on the sofa, and Hyungwon absently closes the door, noticing belatedly that Minhyuk is dripping everywhere.

“I came back for Kihyun’s party.”

“Oh. Okay.”

“Also, it was the excuse I needed.”

“For what?”

Hyungwon doesn’t wait for an answer, goes to grab a towel from his tiny bathroom and throws it at Minhyuk. Who grabs him by the wrist, and doesn’t let go.

“I was a coward. I needed an excuse to come back and see you.”

“Okay.”

Hyungwon eyes are riveted to the hand clasped over his arm. Minhyuk tugs and he follows, sitting down beside him. The towel rests like a veil upon Minhyuk’s head.

“I should have given you an explanation.”

“It’s okay. It was pretty self-explanatory.”

Minhyuk winces. Grabs the towel, folds it in his lap. Hyungwon finally notices how fidgety he is, and it is so out of character he gets anxious despite himself.

“Look. I got scared. You became…”

There’s a wave, Minhyuk gesturing at all of Hyungwon.

“You became too intense. I don’t do feelings. I come and go. But then… You wear everything on your face. It was so obvious you were hurting. And so obvious that you loved me. Cause, you did, right?”

Hyungwon nods. He doesn’t remark on the past tense. Doesn’t say he still do. His voice is lost somewhere in the back of his throat.

“But then… I couldn’t bare being the one putting this look on your face. It started hurting me too, to see you like this. And that’s new. I don’t care that much. I didn’t use too. So I got scared. And then I ran away.”

Hyungwon wouldn’t be surprised, looking out the window, to see the droplets of rain just hovering in the air. It feels like a moment out of time, surreal, to have Minhyuk on his couch talking about feelings. So he clears his throat, tries to speak, but all he manages to croak out is a feeble _okay?_ because right now, nothing really makes sense.

Minhyuk swallows, smiles, but it’s small and a bit forced.

“So, yeah. I wanted to apologize. I’m sorry. For everything.”

Hyungwon doesn’t answer, and Minhyuk looks down at his lap. He has folded the towel in a perfect square and puts it down on the coffee table, getting up.

“So I guess… I guess I will see you at Kihyun’s.”

Hyungwon nods, and Minhyuk looks wistful before turning around to leave. That’s when his words finally sink in, and Hyungwon goes after him, putting a hand on the door to keep Minhyuk there.

“Wait. What you’re saying is… Look, I saw the painting. It’s me, isn’t it?”

There’s a pause and –

“Yeah, it is.”

“Do you have… feelings, for me?”

Minhyuk has a half-smile, maybe out of embarrassment, or something else. Relief.

“Yeah, I think I… I did some soul-searching, back in Gwangju, and…”

Hyungwon doesn’t let him finish. He slides a hand behind his neck and kisses him, slow and deliberate. He feels Minhyuk smile against his lips, before his mouth parts and a hand tangles in his hair, tugging slightly. He moans, pushes Minhyuk against the door, and Minhyuk laps at his mouth, desire unfurling with each breath. Then there’s a laugh, and –

“We’re gonna be late for the party.”

“Yeah, true.”

He still slides a hand under Minhyuk’s shirt, who laughs, light and airy.

 

7.

They do make it to the party on time. Kihyun raises both eyebrows when he sees them enter together, but questions are kept for later. They never come, though, Kihyun disappearing at the end of the night. Hoseok can only wag his eyebrows when they ask where he is, so they both decide to go back to Hyungwon’s apartment. They still have some talking to do.

But first Minhyuk pushes Hyungwon on the sofa and burns fire on his skin. It’s okay, because Hyungwon is water, he can take it. The smooth expense of Minhyuk’s skin is unblemished, and he squirms and moans under Hyungwon’s touch. There is a moment of floating, of exploration, a re-learning of each other. Minhyuk is strangely subdued, but it doesn’t last, and the embers soon flare up.

It’s when a nice lethargy descends upon them that the enormity of the situation hits Hyungwon. Minhyuk is warm and sticky against his chest, heavy-lidded eyes looking up at him. He yawns, and Hyungwon feels a strange worry eating at him.

“What are we, now?”

“I don’t know?”

Minhyuk settles more comfortably, pushes himself higher on Hyungwon’s chest, rests his face in the crook of his neck, hidden.

“But I want to try.”

“What if it doesn’t work out?”

“You don’t think it’s worth trying?”

Hyungwon looks up at the ceiling, an arm coming up to rest on the dip of Minhyuk’s waist. He knows how Minhyuk is, impetuous and brash and unpredictable. But now he’s naked and vulnerable against him, his voice uncertain, hiding from his gaze for fear of what he would see in it. If this isn’t worth trying, nothing is, he thinks, and he gently nudges Minhyuk until he’s looking at him, swipes his hair from his face.

“It is. Just – don’t… don’t run away.”

Minhyuk nods, looking almost solemn.

There’s relief, but there’s a lot of unspoken things, too. How Hyungwon knows he can’t ask for Minhyuk to reciprocate his feelings instantly. How he’s not sure Minhyuk will ever be able to love someone the way Hyungwon does. But also, how for now, just like this, it is enough. For him to be back, to be warm, to be caring. Hyungwon feels like he’s teetering at the edge of a precipice, and he’s not sure on which side he’s going to fall. But Minhyuk is going to try, so he will, too.


End file.
